NIght before Election 2012

I remember that November day in 2008, there was a different atmosphere every where I went. Maybe it was because I was living and existing within the liberal and academic confines of a university, but I remember that victorious and liberating sense that hung about Minneapolis like it like it was yesterday. My class mates and I had worked hard in sorting out our own thoughts and responsibilities in voting in our first presidential election. Mine was made up of a few experiences, such as losing my job at an independent business due to the economic downturn, participating or observing worker's strikes on campus, participating in political performances and many lucid conversations with friends in college and friends from studying overseas. Being a campaign volunteer, and a Chicago-bred girl also helped the victor's cause as I was a bleeding heart Obama fan, ready to cast my vote for change. Flash forward four years later to my 25-year old self, to my classroom in Denver within an urban public school district. Now I am a current graduate student with 3 1/2 years teaching under my belt, working hard to close the racial and socioeconomic achievement gap, dutifully paying my taxes, using my health care plan as an independent, exercising my specific rights as a female, and doing my share to contribute to the American society. And may I add that the things I have experienced just in the last four years have transformed me into someone completely different than who I was four years ago when I cast my first vote. I have been exposed to the difficulties the economy has presented to low to middle class families. I have witnessed the difficulties that complicated immigration policies present. I have seen injustice within the American school system and I have been a part of the after effects from NCLB. This has made me wary and worried about the status of Americans, primarily with equity and accessibility for all citizens to a good, healthy and happy life. With all this being said, I still do have a lot yet to experience. More things to come that will shed even more light on the government and its connections to me. However I feel refreshed to take a step back and realize how much more affected and more informed I am this round, and confident about how I am casting my vote and how it will impact my future. On the night before the 2008 presidential election, I sat down and wrote about communication, and human interactions. Perhaps mostly because I was performing my first big civic duty of participating in democracy, to have my voice heard and my vote counted. Perhaps also I was heavily engaged in theater-based classes and soaking in new information like a greedy sponge every day. But in my reflections that night, I also charged my community with an important task that I myself in the last four years have failed to fulfill, so I am not about to blame our president for falling short on any of his promises. My much more insightful and empathetic self actually said, "No matter where you are, there is no harm in speaking with people about their world-view. Being as informed as you possibly can only makes you more confused, but it can also only offer an exchange to inform the less informed. Speaking with people, body to body, face to face and creating a chain of real story-telling I think is the most conducive way to START change, somewhere in the world at least. Build space for mutual respect and share your own history." Yikes, Caroline. Then how come you haven't been engaging with others about this election? Yes of course, engaging with friends who share the same views. Definitely engaging with my students, from the ages of five to fifteen, about who would THEY vote for and why, and asking them why I should vote for who I will vote for. Engaging with my parents and close family who I already knew agreed with me in the first place. Engaging with my boyfriend in a few challenging conversations, who tends to reject politics because of the devisiveness it causes within his family. But have I been trying to "informed the less informed?" I wouldn't put 4th graders into the less informed category, necessarily because they cannot vote. Back the train up, have I made myself as informed as I can possibly be? I wish I could do better. I wish I took time to speak with others who have different perspectives than I do, to understand their stories more thoroughly, and to challenge my own thinking. I teach my students to think that way, why can't I practice it myself? The public has been quick to size up Obama's '08 promises to the results he has presented since he was elected. But before we are so quick to consider his failures, perhaps we should check on our own. When resolutions or promises have you failed to maintain over the past four years? Over the past year, six months, week? How often do you hold yourself accountable to living the values that you hold so important in a leader of our country? Do you challenge your own thinking by engaging with others, or by taking opportunities to teach when you think there is a teaching moment to be had? Nobody is perfect, and nobody should pretend to be. But I do think that everyone deserves multiple chances to check in with themselves and hold themselves responsible for their own actions. Lucky for me, I spend my day chock-full of teachable moments and have many of them! But I have decided I am not going to waste any more of those opportunities. I am not going to pass up chances to listen, to consider or to engage (and that includes seven year olds to seventy year olds). My older, more reserved self, is going to take the advice of a strapping 21-year-old hopeful that landed herself in Colorado to take this voting opportunity to engage, to teach, to learn, to listen, and to live my values.

3 years of teaching, check!

One more week of my 3rd year of teaching! Compared to my first two, this one has definitely given me more satisfaction, more enjoyment and more personal growth I think than I had in my first two. Being in a new school, in a new position, new living situation, new friends and family in Colorado, I really think I have clarified a lot of things that were fuzzy before and I know that being a teacher is what I am supposed to be doing. It is excited to see this a bit more clearly and to be able to plan for the next few years to work harder on being the best drama teacher that I can be. This weekend I did a day and a half training for being licensed to teach yoga to kids. I decided to do it in spite of a parent letter I got from one of my students addressing the yoga stretches I teach my kids in drama. They had asked me to not involve their child in any yoga activities whatsoever and so this sparked my curiosity about what it actually DOES mean to teach yoga. I went through a training at a local yoga organization here in Denver, and I am excited to see where this new knowledge takes me. I have a lot of ideas about adding different activities and concepts to my curriculum, and even adding an after school yoga club at my school. The summer is filled with a few visits from family and friends, a trip to St. Louis, a trip to California, and possibly a trip to Chicago. I will also be teaching drama at the Museo de las Americas and preparing to start my graduate program in the fall. Crazy how fast 3 years have gone by, especially this last year. I am grateful for all of the changes that have presented themselves and allowed me to grow and learn and allow Denver to be a bigger and bigger part of who I am and the direction I am taking my career and life!

Everything is falling into place

Lots to update!

- Getting closer to the Shakespeare Festival! First we have a Spring Arts Night to perform our scenes at, so the kIds have been working hard on memorizing their lines and blocking, and I have been running all over the city collecting costume pieces and making sure everything is prepared for the Arts Night. I am proud of the kids and I think they will do great.

- Found out this week that I am accepted to begin at the University of Northern Colorado in the Fall of 2012 in their Master's program in Theater Education! Very exciting news, feeling like I am FINALLY making bigger strides towards learning and growing in my profession, and I cannot wait to get started.

-Got a little summer gig teaching theater at the Museo de las Americas Summer Camp! I volunteered at this camp 2 years ago when there were about 24 kids, and they told me that this year there will be about 90 some kids between kindergarten age and 6th grade! Very excited for the opportunity and to stay a bit busy this summer staying sharp on my teaching skills.

- Brought K home to Chicago for the first time, showed him around the city and he met the family. Very proud of him for getting accepted into school and making a positive splash with my family and friends. He is such a great part of my life right now and it was wonderful to bring him back there and show him that part of me.

- Also just looking forward to an already pretty busy summer of visitors and vacations and working and relaxing. Spring time is the busiest time of the year it seems like, and so the summer arriving and being a bit longer, will be very rewarding. : )


With a bunch of negativity around me this week, my clarifying and SWEATY yoga session tonight motivated me to sit down and hammer out the summer and the rest of the spring, and also gave me some space in my head to reflect on all the POSITIVE things that have happened and that are happening. I am proud of the progress I have made this year and I am excited about all of the possibilites of things that are to come!

"It's not WHO you are, it's THAT you are."

Mini successes in the life of a drama teacher

It's about that time in the year when stress is high, people are tense, kids are a bit stir crazy from being inside all the time, teachers are plagued by the time constraints and pressures of standardized testing... I thought I'd take inventory NOW on the mini success I have experienced recently despite the crazy climate!

*New surge of motivation and inspiration - applied for MA in Theater Education at the University of Northern Colorado, to begin next fall. Set long term career goal to develop and design a Neighborhood Bridges- like program here in Denver! more to come...

* 6 Flip Cams were donated to my classroom through generous donations made through donorschoose.org. My 8th graders this rotation are awesomely inspiring and made some amazing commercials http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKuFHh6PX8U&list=LLpD9qlY-c5E2HC9hjcsNSpA&feature=mh_lolz.
This has begun my creation of a new unit all about FILM MAKING! These kids are super technological and have such creative ideas.. Stay tuned to more video projects done by my middle schoolers...

*Shakespeare Club is in full swing, and I have adapted 3 scenes from Twelfth Night for about 10 3rd-8th graders to perform in the DPS Shakespeare Festival in May. It has been a bit of an undertaking, but I have to admit that when I hear children speaking Shakespeare, it gives me the chills! I can't wait to teach them more about this story, these characters, and expose them to the curiosity they may find studying this work!

* Stepped up for some more leadership responsibilities at my school, got some compliments that were well needed, and going back to my old school to see old students today and watch my new students play them in basketball.


While things are often discouraging, and the politics of teaching in a public school can sometimes blind us from the work we are doing, I have to continuously take a look at these things that I AM doing and enjoy my students that I have right now. This is what I've been wanting to do all along!

Happy New Year

One week into the new year and one week away from turning 25, feels like a good time to check in!

The holidays were a blur of work, holiday activities, directing and presenting my first student play, (!!!) some time in IL and OH with family and friends, time in the mountains skiing, and back to school again. This time of year seems to fly by, but I feel like I did a decent job of soaking in the time to relax, not get too stressed or frenzied, and enjoy time off with people that I care about.

The play was successful! Didn't think it would go as well as it did, while not perfect, the girls demonstrated to me that at the last minute they could perform! And I am quite proud of the time and energy we put into it. Today was the first day of Shakespeare rehearsals/auditions, and despite anxiety last night about working with some of the other adults or having nightmarish kids show up, it was actually SUPER uplifting and exciting to hear students saying lines like, "if music be the food of love, then play on!"

Even though after sleepless weekends of fun and skiing I really dread getting out of bed and driving 40 minutes to Green Valley Ranch, there are certainly aspects of my job that I am really really loving, especially compared to the last 2 years. I still really miss the companionship of friends from RBN and the comfort there was there of visiting and venting to other friends, BUT I think that I am beginning to develop a foundation at FPW for the kids.

Bring on 25! Still thinking about values to dedicate this time to.. but while I think about that I do have some goals:

-Run the Bolder Boulder 10K in May
-Get Kevin to Grayslake/Chicago
-Get accepted to grad school at UNC

Family & Faith

Sorry I've neglected you once again for a 2 month stint little blog. As I've told myself before, it's so important to reflect as you go, and lately I've just been going and perhaps in the absence of reflecting more frequently, found myself a little bit out of sorts.

Already in my 14th week of teaching drama! Began a new semester this past week with kindergarten, 1st grade, 4th grade, 6th grade and 8th grade. Some things that have gone well, in the midst of constantly changing my speaking register and the arrangement of my room to accomodate 5 year olds to 15 year olds -

-the little ones made character hats before they acted out the 3 Little Pigs. Super cute, super easy lesson and really helped them develop character a little quicker than just character walks and voices. (works well for Kinder and 1st, maybe even 2nd)

-did an impromptu speech project with the older students - they had 30 seconds to present a cold speech from a topic they chose on the spot, then we reflected on good and bad speaking habits. Even though this lesson was rocky at times, I think for me it really did set up a clear baseline of where the kids' confidence is at and it also gave me an opportunity to stress how important it is to be able to have conviction and confidence when you are speaking.

Otherwise, I've been a bit discouraged lately. Maybe it's the point in the year when you're supposed to see some kind of amazing shift in the creativity the students are putting out there, and I'm just not seeing it. Maybe it's the point in the year where I am supposed to be getting feedback about how great I am doing - but I feel like I have received the opposite. Looking for inspiration in Denver is hard, the mountains are a wonderful sanctuary on the weekends to forget about the stress I put on myself related to work. But artistic and creative inspiration is sparse.

For these fallish/winterish months I've decided to focus on family and faith, and see what happens when I trust my roots and the people who root me, more than just my own individual endeavors and ideas. I want to be surprised by what I can actually discover when I put my faith in my family and my family and their faith, first?!

the definition of faith is --- complete trust or confidence in someone or something

To me, this means letting go of instincts that go otherwise than what your heart tells you. Having faith that the future is going to turn out okay, based on the fact that all decisions you've made up to now have created a great life, full of adventures, friends, challenges and triumphs. Letting go of worries and difficulties, and having faith that the people who love you and you loving yourself is what is going to make everything fall into its right place.


the definition of family is - a person or people related to one and so to be treated with a special loyalty or intimacy

Coming from a very small actual biological family, my idea of family includes but extends past just my parents, grandparents, etc. While they are the people who root me, who we have an unconditional and mutual love for each other, when I think about who else I treat with special loyalty or intimacy it definitely includes many friends I've made along the way. These days it includes a boyfriend, who has a large biological family nearby, whom he has so graciously included me in many times now, and provides me with a huge sense of special intimacy. This leaves me feeling super grateful but also with a sense of emptiness and wonder how he'd fit with my family, with my home base, how he can intertwine himself with my roots.

So I am going to ask a lot of questions, give lots of love and attention to family and the faith that they provide me with. Seems appropriate at the holiday times anyways, but has been something that has been on my brain a lot recently. I'll be going back home twice this holiday season, and I am confident that those trips will give me lots of motivation and recharged energy to use in the areas I feel deflated these days.

So cheers to turkey or tofurkey, cheers to snow, cheers to love that comes in many wonderful forms.
C

Commitment & Creativity

If there are any followers out there, sorry it's been so long! Caroline has still been in Denver, but my life is such a super different version than what it was the last time I made some remarks on this little blog. Let's start with the biggies -

-said good bye to some really amazing students, co-workers and friends

- spent 3 weeks this summer teaching THEATER at Denver Camp at my placement school, with 4th-8th graders. Lots of fun, great practice for my new job!

-moved to a new apartment by myself, just around the corner from my previous house, after the other 3 of my room mates and I all went separate directions for new journeys!

-spent the rest of the summer taking trips for college friends' weddings in Sioux Falls and Kansas City, a few trips to Minneapolis to spend time with my bride friend whom I am a bridesmaid for this fall, also taking an epic camping trip to Capitol Reef NP, Bryce Canyon NP, and ZIon NP all in Utah with my fabulous friend and previous room mate, and finally a trip home to see my extended family in Chicago

-met a really great guy who I am still spending lots of time with and is making me very happy

Flash forward to NOW. Working at my new job teaching drama to 2nd, 3rd, 5th and 6th graders right now, but will eventually see almost all 990 students at FPW. LOVING the challenge of creating my own curriculum, the challenge of starting up a theater program at this school, putting together a drama club, potentially putting up some performances, and embracing the every day laughter and joy of being with kids while they create, perform and respond. It is really a great change for me, and every day I learn something new that inspires me to make myself better.

I have not given up on my monthly intentions, I just haven't been as faithful about blogging them. I think August and September has been commitment and creativity.

commitment = dedication; application, a pledge or undertaking

creativity = the use of the imagination or original ideas, esp. in the production of an artistic work.


I have really RE-COMMITTED to teaching after a summer of lots of changes, and specifically been trying to COMMIT to my new placement. Being at a new school is not easy, meeting teachers, getting used to the culture and the kids even. But after about 6 weeks, it feels right being there, and even though there are good and bad days, I feel a sense of commitment to being there and being my best self. I have also needed to commit to the way my life has changed, realizing that a lot of my closest friends are no longer here or close by, but having this new special person in my life to commit to, it's been something to work on for me.

I have also really needed to fuel my creativity, as I see my students for 45 minutes in 3 week or 6 week blocks, so constantly evaluating my lesson plans and how I can transfer creative instincts to my students in that short amount of time. I have already joined some professional communities in Denver to help fuel my creativity, and I have began some, what I think, are creative ideas for my year in theater/drama. So I am excited to continue these efforts to fuel my creativity.

I want to use the blog now to continue to practice my writing, as I have realized that maybe some day I'd consider a career of it (?) but also to provide other theater teachers or aspiring drama enthusiasts or educators, with ideas that have worked for me. So look forward to more posts about creative lessons or ideas to use in K-8 general ed classes and theater classes.

As JP always says, peace, love and learning.

C